Pittsburgh Theological Seminary

Bridging the Word and the World

3/4 2016

Why does God hate me?

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why does god hate meA couple of months ago, the New York Times ran a fascinating article called “Googling for God.” In this piece, author Seth Stephens-Davidowitz explores recent trends in Google search data specifically related to questions people pose about God. Stephens-Davidowitz notes that the number one God-related question people ask on Google is, “Who created God?” Not surprisingly, number two is “Why does God allow suffering?” However, I was shocked and dismayed to see the question that came in at number three: “Why does God hate me?”

Stephens-Davidowitz then provides an even more troubling piece of information: “What is the most common word to complete the following question: Why did God make me ___? Number one, by far, is ‘ugly.’ The other sad answers in the top three are ‘gay’ and ‘black.’” Although the author of this article does not explicitly link “Why does God hate me?” and “Why did God make me ___?” I couldn’t help but wonder if there might be some connection between the two questions. After all, if you believe God made you “ugly,” it’s not a stretch to believe God hates you, too, since in our culture “ugly” is a very negative term that is used to denigrate people based, primarily, on their appearance. In the same way, given that those who identify as black or gay are often marginalized in our society—or even targeted for violence on the basis of those identities—it’s not hard to imagine that members of those groups might feel that God is, at best, indifferent to their plight, or, at worst, that God has hand-picked them to be oppressed and mistreated.

Reading this article made me deeply sad, because it made me realize just how many incorrect ideas about God are still out there, and how deeply those ideas are hurting people. Although the church certainly teaches that we are all sinners and have fallen short of God’s glory, it also fundamentally affirms that each one of us is created in the image of God and that through God’s grace we are loved unconditionally. Somehow it seems that this crucial message has gotten lost in the wider culture, because as the Google data show, people searching on the Internet for answers to their faith questions seem to assume that God is primarily a judgmental, capricious tyrant who selectively applies oppression and suffering to certain groups, or who makes some people “ugly” and others not.

The problem here is that it’s not God who is doing this labeling and excluding—it’s human beings. We are the ones who have created societies in which individuals are judged based on their physical appearance or on their membership in particular demographic groups, rather than on the content of their character or according to their unique gifts and skills. We—not God—are the ones who have decided that some are “in” and some are “out,” which is in direct contrast to the message we hear over and over again in Scripture: that God has come into the world to reconcile all people, through grace that is freely given to everyone. As the church, we are called to find new ways to spread the message of God’s grace and love far and wide, so that we might challenge and dismantle the erroneous theology that is causing people so much harm. My prayer is that one day, in the not-so-distant future, Google might report their top God-related searches as “Why does God care for me so much?” and “Why did God make me so beautiful and beloved?” May it be so.

The Rev. Dr. Leanna K. Fuller is assistant professor of pastoral care at Pittsburgh Theological Seminary and teaches in the MDiv Program. Her ministry experience includes serving as associate pastor of Oakland Christian Church in Suffolk, Va., where she coordinated youth ministry and Christian education programming. She writes regularly on pastoral care and counseling, pastoral theology, and congregational conflict.

Comments ( 41 )

    • That’s understandable, Jim. Tragedy and pain can be very isolating. I encourage you to reach out in whatever way you can (whether to a friend, a church community, or a professional) to get any support you might need.

  • The more I pray the worse my life becomes. If you only knew what I have been through… when will it be my season???????????????????????????????? W
    I NEVER ASKED TO BE BORN… I NEVER ASKED FOR ANY OF THIS… SO MY LIFE HAS TO BE COMPLETELY SATURATED WITH disappointment, depression, trauma, abuse, sickness – I keep praying but it gets worse

    • M – I am so sorry you are feeling so badly. It sounds like you are experiencing what St. John of the Cross called the “dark night of the soul” – a time when it seems that God is completely absent and does not hear our fervent prayers. I don’t have a good explanation for why God feels so far away sometimes, or why terrible things happen even when we are praying as hard as we can. I do believe that God hears our prayers, even when it seems no one is listening, and that God loves us and wishes the best for us always. I hope you will be able to find someone who can support you in this time of great sorrow (maybe a friend, a congregation, or a helping professional). Please know I will be keeping you in prayer.

      • Ya, nobody has an answer why God hates some of us. God is not a loving and caring God. Millions of people suffer and he does nothing. Period. He’s cruel.

      • I’ve been having “The dark night of the soul” since I died in 2005. Since I was brought back everything turns sour.
        My friends have left.
        No matter how much I pray the opposite happens. My world keeps becoming smaller. I’ve tried so hard.

        Can you tell me about the dark night of the soul or any good books?

    • ^^^ EVERY SINGLE BIT OF THIS!!! ^^^ Apparently, there is no “god”, period. If there were or if he cared a thing about any of us, our lives would be quite different. After all the @%(# I’ve been put through, the only reality that plays out is: There was no “god” when I was 5 years old; there was no “god” when I was a teenager; there was no “god” when I was in the military and there is no “god” now.

  • Unfortunately even after this article I still believe that if God exist he hates me. Too many bad things have happened to me for me to believe otherwise.

    • Nellie, I understand why you would feel that way given all that you have been through. I can’t explain why such bad things happen to people in a world that God loves. My personal belief is that God loves all people and all of creation, even when it doesn’t seem that way – but I very much respect the fact that you believe differently based on your life experiences. I hope that you will be able to find the resources you need to seek healing and wholeness in your journey. I wish you peace and comfort during this difficult time.

    • That is contradictory to the way I was raised, but I agree with you. At 52 I have nothing to look back on but emotional pain, desperation, depression, loneliness, stress… this list goes on. It actually makes me hope there is no god (or gods) but rather, just randomness. I do not wish to believe in a deity (deities) that would choose to bless some and not others. It is as if my life is a joke, so yeah I hope there’s no god. And, I look forward to nonexistence. That’s the one good thing that WILL happen to me. Whether it’s next week or in another 52 years, it will, indeed, eventually end.

  • I disagree when you claim humans created exclusions and labels. All the mainstream religions, the Holy men/Prophets have superiority complex. Women, people of color, gays, anyone different were treated like slaves and this is promoted in the divine scriptures. God created human along with human nature knowingly and willingly to torture some. People believe in God as a coping mechanism because deep down inside they know such entity does not exist and things never do get better. *$#* God, I hate him and he hates me.

  • But attraction is instinctual, not learned behavior like this article implies, and if God made us in his image, and some people are ugly while others are not, it is impossible to argue that isn’t his bidding.

  • I believe God hates me too, I have suffered with mental illness naturally and also brought on by tons of abuse, I cant seem to compleatly turn my life over I stumble almost every chance I get. I came tonight to go to a gsthering to honer Jesus death and feel like God threw me out I was sooooo uncomfortable and in sooo much pain physicaly too. i couldnt sit on the seat. This has happened on more than one occasion me trying to go to church feeling all tormented and. Here I sit out in the car while I wait for everone to get done for my ride home.

    • I am so sorry you are feeling this way, and that even a house of worship did not feel like a safe space for you to be. I encourage you to seek out any form of support you can find, particularly if you are feeling like you want to harm yourself or someone else. Some good places to look (especially if church feels too painful for you right now) would be in your local hospitals, community mental health centers, or counseling centers. You will be in my prayers.

  • God hates me show much as well. I’ve prayed and asked for forgiveness and grace but I never get an answer. Every time I pray things get worse for the last 7+ years my life has been a misery. I’m so suicidal, I’m dealing with pain and suffering on a daily basis. I feel like I’m being punished every day of my life. I’ve got to the stage when I ask God to end it for me even when I pray for that it doesn’t arrive. I just think I’m put on earth for God to torture.

    • It must be terribly painful to go through what you are experiencing, Graham. I am truly sorry that you are feeling this way, and that you have not been able to find any relief for your suffering. I am concerned for you, and would strongly encourage you to reach out to a helping professional – perhaps a counselor, a physician, or a pastor that you know – and ask for help. If you feel like you are in danger of hurting yourself, please go to your closest Emergency Room or call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. You can find more resources on their website at https://suicidepreventionlifeline.org/ I will be keeping you in my prayers.

  • OK I would have to say God hate us. If an infinite God can do anything created everything down to subatomic particles, stars, black holes and even the notion of time, dimension even the notion of good versus evil would not exist without his bidding. He made it like this. You can’t get something from nothing right? If I build a computer to run a specific spec or program it won’t magically overnight upgrade itself with new algorithms unless you place them there as a variable in the first place. I believe that this universe is to God what a television is the people, it’s just for entertainment purposes. He could give two f**** as long as we play by our rules that he give us, shit on our live’s daily just to spice things up (except for his favorite characters) then expect us to say thank you. We are just toys that got thrown away after the funs been had….even Satan had no say in his role. “But God sends these trials to see if we really love him or “how would we know pain or suffering if everything was perfect?” Well my answer to that question folks is we would because the same argument could be applied to God! Who has never died , FELT FEAR never feel pain, never sweat, never cried, never got sunburn, not even a papercut, NEVER HAD ANYTHING, ANYTHING, not go his way, NEVER EVEN HAD A BAD DAY, Everyday surrounded by TRILLIONS OF thousands of tons of jewels myriad of gold pearls food ,planets, people, friends, in a dimension of neverending bliss, is trying to give us a lesson in pain to prepare our minds for pleasure riiiiiiight. Just look at his kingdom description in revelation, the one about his throne in heaven not the one on earth. For somebody who doesn’t want us to take stock in material possessions sure as hell have way more than even the greediest human could ever acquire in a billion lifetimes. After all we are made in his image so we naturally crave deityhood. It just comes off to me as a universal case of do-as-i-say-not-as-i-do type of thing.

  • And to think that all i ever wanted from God was for him to bless a good man like me with a good wife and family that i still don’t have today unfortunately. God is very mean.

    • Lo and behold, I feel what you’re saying is true, I’m 22yrs old, from a born again family and starting to doubt God’s plan.long story short, there’s a girl I wanted, I prayed to God that she’s be my wife and for awhile it did indeed seem like we would be married but now she’s engaged to a different man. I don’t understand. Why would god tantalize me like this, he says “ask and ye recieve” but now it seems like hes’ really saying “ask and I promise then laugh” it hurts so much being lead to believe he’ll give you something good then have him rescind the promise.

    • You two are like a farmer who expected that God should sow his grain for him. If the farmer should not plow, not sow, and not reap, should he then curse God that he is hungry? And what of the martyrs that faced torture and death but maintained their faith in God? Did they accuse God of being mean or of tantalizing them?

      • To be fair the guy before you stated what seemed to be sowing into a relationship, and next regarding those Martys I’d argue their situation while worse in any conceivable way is not comparable due to what each person in this life goes through some people can suffer a cheating spouse and move on while others will be tormented with bitterness and all sorts of sorrow, I see it as the farmer who scattered the seeds some just got the break of being sown in good soil regardless of the environment they are in if they are essentially placed in great conditions they will grow, imagine a seed on a concrete road never to be moved but the place around it is perfect for it to grow but it’s not sown where it can grow, I feel for people like them rejection can be painful but I argue God can not give you a wife He might set everything up to be possible but He never forces His will on us in this way, I’ve been there I was deeply in love but it wasn’t mutual I was left for another and I am what supposedly she wanted but she chose otherwise and I admit it still bothers me, I learned that you can not expect God to give you a wife or to keep one for that matter, you have to just be the best person you can be and open up if you find someone your interested in and take note of anything similar to the ex ladies and if they are too material or success oriented (I really mean selfish) , beauty is fleeting and charm or niceness sweetness are deceptive but a woman who has good morals is worth your time, and trust me you’ll only fall in love with someone you actually like so don’t worry so much about the beauty is fleeting cause your going to be attracted to her just don’t lie to yourself about being greatly attracted to her personality when you don’t think she is at least attractive on some realistic level to you, no offense to people who feel ugly (girls tell me I’m ugly and handsome, physically, woman are crazy anyway, they can be a detriment to a man) so don’t be in a rush remember the world got ruined because of a man compromising for his woman, don’t compromise your happiness and sanity for a woman they are not worth it, nothing is without it your throwing yourself into fire and misery, I learned my lesson and I have had nothing but ultimately bad experiences with women in my life even outside of dating or whatever you want to call it words only mean what they are understood as anyway, hope you guys get past all that stuff and stop waiting on God to bring you a wife do it yourself and see how it goes. Praying without going out to do what you praise for won’t do nothing trust me! No offense but God kinda sits there looking waiting for you to try something it may or may not work, I just know from my own relationship with God I got to do the work (as per my human abilities to do so) in order to get anything never got a handout for nothing but idle words and discouraging statements like pray and read your bible (like any Christian who can read never read at least some part of the Bible and talked to God) people sometimes just speak without getting it, as for the whole thing with people during and being tortured for their faith no proof can be said that they always keep faith other than what is said and when we meet God I’m sure we will see the truth I hope I get to be with God in His temple but till then idk I’ll just keep suffering till I get over what ever is going on in life including my depression and loneliness and my lack of faith in Gods promises, I hope I get over all my little things and toughen up cause I hate life right now and I haven’t really enjoyed after being saved sense my first girlfriend I’m only 24 now and was saved 2009 got my first gf in 2012 and it was horrible experience and I tried again last year and this was even worse and I tried with others in between but nothing, who knows might never get married might never have kids with someone I will live with for the rest of my life, might die young might die old might be miserable forever might become happy today and forever more or a mix and match idk I just hope God will be more protective of my heart and mind but even then the Bible says guard your heart cause if you don’t we’ll then guess what your screwed cause that’s what’s going to make you look good in Gods eyes despite what Jesus did on the cross which sucks to me cause sometimes no matter how much you want to be good to others and forgive and all that jazz you just can’t seem to get past what your heart feels and thinks, I just want to love God again but I find it hard when I know he is ultimately in control it’s just the thought of that that makes it hurt cause how does my death and misery spiritually and as a whole person glorify his name, I’m terrified of the idea of becoming like Judis or like Cain or like that married couple who died in Acts I lament on the thought of being mocked in hell seeing the promises God had for me supposedly but for what ever reason I was made to be in capable even with the Holy Spirit to overcome the test and receive them supposedly I was supposed to be married like 5 times according to prophets and look at me now and it’s not from a lack of being open and trying this makes it even more difficult to trust God if His supposed prophets who I believe most must have been legit according to accurate and sometimes fulfilled prophecies. I think maybe I’m not good enough that maybe Jesus doesn’t like me because I don’t like being mistreated and desire him to defend me (not do bad things to people just open their eyes to stop being so abusing and evil) or maybe cause I have a porn/sex problem idk, I guess I’m too ugly spiritually while people who are also Christian can do more worse (as far as is fixable) and still come out on top and seem more favorable than me, I get depressed thinking about it, even just looking at my own self and the word it just confirms a conflict and for some reason the contradiction in the Bible to my actuality is too much not to ignore idk I’m just a person like everyone else I use to be super favored ex relationships though never could find a compatible woman as of yet regardless if I do as a man should

  • God only loves and does for who he wants. People worship him and he spits in their face daily. That’s a fact. Ask the children who are repeatedly raped. Ask people who beg God for some relief and he does nothing. But yet child molesters, dope dealers and rapists get whatever they want. But a five year old little girl can beg God to stop being raped and he does nothing. Oh, ya, but God loves you!

  • I so relate to the comments. I am turning 51 in a few days and the only deep desire I have had Is to marry and have a child. I have prayed my whole life for this. I have tried my best to be obedient to God and serve him. We are suppose to trust that His plan for us is the best one. I can’t imagine being alone is His best plan for me. Then I look at my sister who is not a Christian and has a wonderful husband and two beautiful children. Please explain about this loving God??

    • As we can see, nobody has the answers to our pain and torture. This is God’s plan for us, period. If he loved us or we were part of the chosen, he’d do something but he does not. The bottom line is if you love somebody, you show it. You don’t play games and continue to let them suffer when they need you. People I love never have to question my love. Period. I don’t lie to them and tell them to have faith in my love and then continue to turn my back on them.

      • We Deserve a answer from our father as to his silence to our cries. Answers like why do you give us 60 years to get it right but satan gets a planet to rule , rape, and ruin our lives, with us under his whip for thousands of years? Havnt humanity suffered enough? Guess not. I just wish he would explain this to us not as a god but as a father,but good luck with that

  • I love God with all my heart. I want Him to be in my life but he keeps failing me. I trust only on him but does He even foe once think of me? I pray, i fast, i am born again but God hates me and want to dissapoint me everytime. I read His word n believe in it but nothing written there ever works for me. It is hard for me coz all my hope, trust n faith i put in Him but i guess he feel happy seeing me suffer. Why should i suffer if Jesus died for me?

  • This is a sad case where misery does not love company, because it.’seems sadder to know that other people are feeling & suffering as I am. Sure, I’ve made mistakes or incorrect choices, but I am human . I basically do try to lead a good, moral life, follow the “Golden Rule”. Yet, I too firmly believe the more I pray, the worse things become in my life. I’m almost.52 & feel time running out st speed of light! So, I’ve S/w/variety of clergy, seeking the answer to why G-d seems to hate me so much?! I’m still waiting for the answer while trying to figure S god reason not to end my life. As per Dylan: @theanswer I’d blow in’ in the wind”, cause I still don’t know!

  • I too wonder where the loving God is. I am an incest survivor, have had ptsd/mdd, was abandoned by someone who was a lifeline to me, have been homeless and hospitalized, have no family as the abuse occurred in the family, and have been unable due to mental illness to integrate into society. I’ve been discriminated against and treated badly by many. I abused myself as a result of these experiences. I ask God to take me home ever day and know one day I will simply end it. I even had therapists abandon me. I have lived in housing that triggered my symptoms and my dreams are gone. I am middle aged now and have never had a bf. I am tired of life and religion is full of horse**** and false promises. I don’t see Jesus returning or a new heaven and earth or any justice, just worse and worse pain. I do pray for others as I am able but I am tired of everything. I take responsibility for my own errors but anyone who knows the pain of incest knows how it can devastate your life. I look at what others have and at the daily struggle I cover up and am sick of it all. Churches I found to be judgmental places. This is a world for the wicked and evil to thrive in, the kinder you are the more hell you’ll have. I”m sick of God and I’m sick of Christianity’s lies and bullshit. If there is a God he or she is fine with children being raped and tortured and sure as hell doesn’t give a loving plan to anyone I guess except the fake prosperity ministers and those who don’t give two shits about him. I’ve been tortured my entire life even to the point of having demons attack me and having him cruelly test me so he could break me down further. I have zero hope for my life. God destroyed it all and let satan torture me and I hate Christianity and its promises. If there is a God, he isn’t worth praying to. Good luck to all those suffering we all need it.

  • After reading all these comments, at least I can say I’m not alone. So many similar to what I am feeling and going through. My entire life has been a “dark night of the soul”. I have been abuse/neglected from the moment of my conception. No matter how I try to get away. If it’s not family, it’s a significant other, if it’s not that, it’s a coworker, or just some random person I happen to come into contact with. I have been ill most of my life. My youth was stolen from me. I have lost jobs (not because I did anything, but due to “downsizing” or the “economy”. I have been homeless. I have been poor my entire life, regardless of how hard I work. I have had Panic disorder and IBS since I was 18. I have been “alone” my entire life. I prayed and prayed for a husband and as it turns out, the one I got is a meth addict and now I can’t get rid of him. I even went to jail because I tried to defend myself when he was in an alcohol and drug fueled rage. I have been made fun of and laughed at. I have never felt love or security in my life. EVER. Now I have just recently been diagnosed with a brain tumor. THAT DID IT. I just had to let God go. The more I pray, the worse it gets. I have been “walking in the desert” for 45 years. Nothing good has ever happened to me. Even the smallest of tasks are difficult. I’m never going to be allowed to be at peace. All hope is lost, and no one can help. Even knowing you all are suffering too, I am still alone. Obviously we are not going to Heaven, unless it’s for God to continue to use us as whipping posts. So maybe wherever we end up, we’ll end up together at least.

  • God may love us but that doesn’t end age discrimination in seeking employment. It doesn’t stop a “Christian” governor from making an enemies list of people who will never get a state job. It doesn’t stop academia from using “diversity” to refuse you and hire others of less experience and education. It doesn’t quell the pain of constant humiliation oir feeling one’s talents from atrophying. About every other day now I think dead is better.

  • I Dont Really Know What To Say About This.I Thought Am The Only One Passing Thru Such A Terrible Thing.But I 100 Percent Believe The Comment That Says The Kinder You Are The Worst You Suffer

  • “The problem here is that it’s not God who is doing this labeling and excluding—it’s human beings. We are the ones who have created societies in which individuals are judged based on their physical appearance or on their membership in particular demographic groups, rather than on the content of their character or according to their unique gifts and skills.”
    Disagree with the first statement since it is God that taught his children to differentiate between beauty and ugliness by making flowers beautiful and the desert ugly to look at. But God never taught us to destroy deserts or not use them to our benefits, it is humans who decided to exclude ugly creations out of their world when in practice, ugliness can be more useful than beauty.

  • Reading through all these comments is heartbreaking, and I searched this for the same reason as everyone else – suffering. Praying and hoping for something to change, a lifetime of sadness and people who are cruel and unjust. Feeling like some people just get everything their whole life – a nice family who loves them, then their own family, a normal good husband/wife and kids, a good job, nice friends and then on top of it, God blesses them even more. I don’t know why.

    I was thinking while reading this, some people do have an advantage, but, what if the point is to start to live our lives for other people. What if the way out is thinking about what we can do for other people and what WE can do for God, instead of only what he can do for us? It is supposed to be a relationship. Seems pretty one sided if we want to take from him but never give. He wants love too. There are things he wants accomplished on this earth just like we want things in our lives. “Seek first the kingdom of heaven.” We want him to do for us, well, he also wants us to do for him. We are supposed to be his servants.

    What if all the people in this world who were alone, depressed, abused, etc…. spent time reaching out to others instead of only waiting and crying for someone to reach out to them, or for something to “happen”? If you ask God what you can do for him, the answer is almost always to help others. Sometimes it is prophecy/study and then sharing that. Especially in these days. If more people were asking God what they can do for him, then wouldn’t more people be helping YOU? Loving YOU? Who is responsible to do this? We all are, even us who are suffering.

    Then wouldn’t it be more likely that 2 people who needed a friend would find each other? Should we be upset that others are happy? We don’t know what they have been through in the past, or will go through in the future. I was just thinking, maybe, part of being blessed by the Lord, starts with blessing others. You could be the answer to another persons prayers, and in doing so, gain more joy in your own life. I understand so many of us struggle with being shy, being afraid because we have been hurt and betrayed so many times, feeling uncomfortable around new people etc… I have this problem too. I am now at the point where I have no friends and no family (but one child). I finally walked away from the last few people I had, because they are so toxic and abusive. I want to be around healthy, kind, loving people who love the Lord and try to behave how he says to. Not people who project, manipulate, are full of rage. I am afraid to try to meet people though, I am shy and a lifetime of emotional, psychological and verbal abuse has beat me down and taken my confidence. The Lord will start to give it back to you. It isn’t overnight but he will. You didn’t lose it overnight either. I am still to afraid to go out and meet people, but, I know I can ask the Lord all day to magically give me friends, but what I need to ask him for is confidence and courage.

    I don’t know what to do, but I think it starts with getting over my fears and thinking more about other people and how I can help them, instead of how miserable and unfair my life has been. I think the Lord blesses this attitude. I am going to try it. I also believe that he allows trials and they either strengthen us and improve our character, or they can destroy us. Think of it this way – the devil wants your trials to destroy you and cause you to turn away from God, and from truth, and God wants you to overcome, seek him and gain eternal rewards. Who do you want to side with? The one who loves you and is rooting for you to win, or the one who hates you and is rooting for you to fail? I don’t know why we have to suffer and why we have to be here, but I know God is real and I know he is good, and that is why Jesus said you have to become like a little child to enter heaven, because children trust and love, even when they don’t have all the answers.

    God bless you all. If I could meet or be with any of you, I would be your friend, and I love you. May the Lord bless and protect all who read this. That reminds me, “you have not because you ask not” – Jesus. Through all my life of suffering, I am currently suffering the most I ever have, and it is easier than in the past because, this time I realized to ask the Lord regularly for these things: strength, endurance, peace, joy, patience, faith, love, hope, understanding and wisdom.

    You can ask the Lord for a job, money, a spouse, friends, etc… .but ALSO ask him for the above things. Keep doing it day after day, and one day you will think “my life is awful by anyone’s standards, why do I feel so happy right now!?” Then you will realize, oh yes, I have been asking the Lord not only to change my situation, but for the things I need to endure it. You will get sad again, and the pain will return, but it will be less often, and more bearable. Please try asking him for those things, daily. Don’t let go of the one thing that can keep you going: Jesus……he never lets go of you. Please search out people who need someone to encourage them. I wish more people did that, and then maybe I would have at least one person I could count on in addition to Jesus. I am going to seek first the kingdom of heaven, and trust that then all those things will be added to me. I am going to spend my time that I am not spending with friends and family (because I don’t have any) trying to help, love and encourage people who are as sad as I am, and maybe then I won’t be so sad.

    If you made it this far and think, hum, she may have a point, then also please pray and seek more truth, because the time is coming for the final days. You don’t want to be far away from God anytime, but especially not then. My life actually became so terrible because I had dreams from the Lord about the last days, and when I tried to share with the people I know, they became enraged. You have seen this irrational hatred in the Bible. It is here now too. Maybe, your life isn’t hard because God hates you, maybe it is hard because the devil knows God has plans for you, and he wants to do everything to keep you away from being saved, everything to prevent you from doing the Lords work and everything to keep you from being used by God to help bring joy and peace to others. Maybe it is the devil who hates you, not God. Not maybe, it is. He wants to keep you from God, heaven, rewards, blessing others. Don’t let him steal all God has for you! God bless you!

  • Why did god make me a boy? Or why did he give me this personality to crave it? Who knows. I prayed everyday but still nothing. He likes seeing me suffer I guess. That’s like putting food in front of a hungry dog and saying don’t eat it.

  • Being ugly is the most hurtful thing on earth. It leaves you wondering why God created you. It hurts. And God doesnt answer ur prayers if you are ugly. Depressed

  • I really wonder sometimes why didn’t God make a very good man like me meet a good woman to have a family with instead of still being Single And Alone today which it wasn’t my choice at all either. It is just too very bad that most of the women of today are Nothing at all like the women in the old days were since it was definitely very easy meeting a good woman back then with No Trouble at all. Women today unfortunately have certainly Changed since then which is very sad.

  • Well I believe in God and I got saved around 5 but then I started to doubt I was saved because I started having feeling of wanting to become a girl and I’m still attracted to girls as well but my question is if I were to become a girl was I ever saved at all? I don’t like the fact I want to be a girl because I know its a sin but I cant help it .

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